So Mary is currently bringing C1 to have lunch with the potential adoptive family. We got into an argument because Mary and the adoptive mother have been coordinating a schedule for the transition. It involves about 6 different stays at their house until he actually lives there. Mary didn't consult with me at all.
Having C1 out of the house yesterday wouldn't be soon enough for me. However, I understand he's too unstable to just move in there. But the stress of having him in the house is seriously affecting me. I am pregnant and hormonal so there is only so much I can control. And I am in fear that it's going to be a failed placement if there's so many visits.
One of the respite people we used absolutely loved him and thought he was so sweet. Then after 3-4 times of being there, he went into one of his rages and broke a bunch of stuff at her house. So she wouldn't take him again. This was C1 getting comfortable. He did it to us, the first few weeks we were shocked at some of the things his great-grandmother had told us about him. Then he got comfortable and we went "oh sh*t, what did we get ourselves into?". I can't deal with a failed adoptive placement since I NEED him out of the house.
I figured he'd go a couple times and in between he can talk to them on the phone and then he would start to live there. I am also thinking about the child we're adopting, C2. It's going to be confusing if C1 is going back and forth so many times and again, we need to prepare C2 for future events such as BABY.
These people also live over 3 hours away. Mary's all, "I'll handle it" but that's exactly what I don't want, I'd like a say in what's going on in my life. Especially if it's something that's affecting me so negatively.